I wasn't always Femme.
Heck, I spent many years of my life playing the straight girl I thought I had to be to make everyone happy. Until I realised I wasn't happy. I came out, cut my hair short, wore cargo pants and drank cheap beer.
Cos isn't that what lesbians do?
And then I saw 'Bound'.
I wanted to be Violet (Jennifer Tilly). I wanted to date Corky (Gina Gershon). It resonated.
I started wearing skirts and makeup (it wasn't pretty at first, but some Drag Queens helped me on my way). Baby steps.
I got hassled by my feminist-lesbian-seperatist flat mates for buying into the patriarchy.
The image of Corky and Violet never went away.
Girlfriends came and went. They were always kinda butch. They all had a thing for the slightly more feminine girls. They liked women in heels.
I met others like me. I took inspiration from their pride, fierceness and damn-good dress sense.
I still got derided and ignored by the mainstream dykes (the gaystream). I still do. The majority of people out there think i'm straight.
But I don't care anymore - it might have taken 10 years but i'm finally Violet.